How Do You Do It, They Ask. I Don’t, I Say.

On the way back to the event we were to be at this evening, from going to Lowes to purchase a table for the farmers market – style event that I forgot a table for, I said to Lee, “I’m a freaking mess. People ask me how I keep it together. I tell them I never did! Ever!”

“If anything, it’s probably gotten better since you had a kid,” he said.

“At least I admit my shortcomings!”


It’s true. I have always, 100%, been a hot freaking mess. I would forget my head if it wasn’t attached to me. It’s true, and I admit it to the fullest extent I can.

You see, we decided to go to this event on a whim. I let Lee decide if we went. He said we should, so I spent the weekend putting together a wholesale flyer and some stuff for a display.

We packed up Callie after work and headed to Easton. I forgot the dang table.

So, we get there, and I realize it. I call my friend, T-Hahn whom will also be attending, and he recommends Lowes since he was almost there, too. Super. We can do that.

So, we go to Lowes, and I select the 4 ft table because the 6 ft table is bigger than we need and the other tables we have are 4 ft. I check out. I’m making great time. I get to the trunk and the DANG THING DOESN’T FIT! Because our other 4 ft tables fold, and this one doesn’t. So, I have to go in, return said table, and buy the 6 ft table that will fit in the trunk. It took forever for the lady to return it because she can’t multi-task. I’m annoyed beyond belief, but retrospectively I can now see that’s extremely hypocritical of me. After all, I’m the one that forgot the dang table and how has to rush around like a crazy person.

Here I am, the crazy lady again!

We get there. We get set up. Everything is fine. My bladder is about to explode though. I find the bathroom, up 3 flights of very long, steep stairs. I got back downstairs and Lee says Callie probably  needs changed. Super.

I’m not carrying my kid up those stairs. I’m tired and sweaty from running like a crazy person and carrying stuff around, and those are steep stone stairs.

I find a little side room and put her down on the changing pad.

You know where the story is going… yes. It is. She did.

Green poop up the back. Awesome. Good thing I’ve got ample wipes, and plastic bag, and a change of clothes.

Can’t remember a dang table, but we’ve got the tools to handle this. Her shoes need washed, though. They’ll survive this, but they need a swirl in the washer. With soap. And not just a swipe of the wipe.

I also find it ironic that we went to a Buy Fresh, Buy Local event and stopped at Burger King on the way home because it was fast, we were super hungry, and we didn’t have time to eat at home before Callie’s bath and bedtime.

We ooze class. And irony. And I don’t, nor will I ever have it together. No fear, though. I’ll die trying!



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